A bet of feeling

For all the things that I had did in the past,a sin is a sin. I'm not perfect. But I am no stranger. I did a lot of mistakes but I guess I didn't learn that much. I'm growing up. I'm not getting younger. I need to open my mind and my eyes I need a changing in my life. Maybe a space. A space where I can think clearly what I want. I need to let go my past. Obviously,I don't let it go yet.Am I afraid or what? Honesty,insecure,commitment. Do I really have all those 3? I don't have the answer. I really don't..